Lesson #24: I Lived.

8/12/14.

Lessons come in many forms.

They come in the form of experiences. They come in the form of words.

They can even come in the form of art.

And tonight, it came in the form of music.

If you’ve been following my blog, or my ridiculous life on social media, you know I’ve been to quite a few really great concerts this summer.

But tonight, The Script and OneRepublic blew everything else away.

I could go on for hours about how phenomenal they were. How genuinely passionate, purely and truly talented, hilarious, and entertaining both of the groups were. But this is a lesson, not a concert review, so I’ll unfortunately have to spare you the greatness.

I’m a huge fan of a few of their songs, but the last song in OneRepublic’s set I was unfamiliar with.

It’s called,

I Lived.

Before I say anything else, I’m just going to let you read these lyrics.

“I Lived”

[Verse 1]
Hope when you take that jump
You don’t fear the fall
Hope when the water rises
You build a wall

Hope when the crowd screams out
They’re screaming your name
Hope if everybody runs
You choose to stay

Hope that you fall in love
And it hurts so bad
The only way you can know
Is give it all you have

And I hope that you don’t suffer
But take the pain
Hope when the moment comes
You’ll say…

[Chorus]
I, I did it all
I, I did it all
I owned every second
That this world could give
I saw so many places
The things that I did
Yeah, with every broken bone
I swear I lived

[Verse 2]
Hope that you spend your days
But they all add up
And when that sun goes down
Hope you raise your cup

I wish that I could witness
All your joy and all your pain
But until my moment comes
I’ll say…

[Chorus]
I, I did it all
I, I did it all
I owned every second
That this world could give
I saw so many places
The things that I did
Yeah, with every broken bone
I swear I lived

[Bridge]
Whoa
Whoa
Whoa
Oh
Oh
Yeah, with every broken bone
I swear I lived
Yeah, with every broken bone
I swear I lived

[Chorus]
I, I did it all
I, I did it all
I owned every second
That this world could give
I saw so many places
The things that I did
Yeah, with every broken bone
I swear I lived.

Lately, I’ve felt this certain disdain towards myself.

Please, I’m not asking for a pity party.

I’m just being real with you.

This certain disdain has been nagging at me, because lately I have felt like a lot of my feelings towards certain things have been invalid. Like I’ve had no right to feel them. Like I shouldn’t feel them. Like I have felt them too deeply. That I care about certain things too much. Or that I care about certain people too much. Or too little. Like I shouldn’t have told them that. Like I shouldn’t have told them all of that. Like I am too vulnerable now. Or I am not vulnerable enough. (Maybe I need to remind myself of Lesson #2…)

I’ve realized, the only person convincing myself to feel this way… is me.

I need to leave my feelings alone.

I’m literally bullying them into something they are not.

How can you feel your own feelings wrong?

And this is why I immediately fell in love with this song.

It’s telling you to live.

Live deeply.

Live with every last piece of you.

Life isn’t just about seeing all that you can, or doing all that you can.

Life is about feeling everything that you can.

And feeling it fully.

It’s about experiencing every inch and corner on the spectrum of emotions.

I’m not telling you to be a psychotic lunatic.

We don’t want to have to chain you up, please.

But.

I am telling you,

OneRepublic is telling you,

whatever you are feeling, feel it.

And it’s completely valid.

Love deeply.

Laugh deeply.

Be on a complete high.

Be on a complete low.

Be entirely worn out. Be entirely alive.

Be happy. Be angry. Be sad. Be excited.

Be.

And don’t be ashamed or scared of be-ing.

After all, we are human beings.

Never be embarrassed, or humiliated, or reluctant, or regretful of your feelings.

Because, well, that’s just how you feel.

And that’s life.

I now know that that’s actually life.

Ryan Tedder, the lead singer of OneRepublic, said he received a letter tonight right before he went on stage from a person in the audience, saying that this very song saved their lives.

How powerful is that?

Thanks to this song, that person is going to live.

That person is going to feel.

Art is my favorite kind of lesson,

because we each get a different, unique lesson from it.

We each get keep our own little special message.

And this is what I got from this song.

That is what that anonymous audience member got from this song.

From this piece of art.

From this lesson.

What did you get?

Day Twenty-Four.

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