Lesson #152: F.O.M.O.

12/20/14.

I have this condition called FOMO.

Fear of missing out?

You heard of it?

Well.

I do this thing where I try to make it to as much as possible, because I don’t want to miss anything fun, or good. If it means hopping from place to place, or re-arranging or rescheduling to make it to everything… I’ll be there.

The worst part about FOMO is that I’ll make myself go—even when I really just don’t want to.

I guess that doesn’t sound like a bad thing.

But the bad thing is, that I always convince myself by not going, I am boring, or lame, or missing out, or not living life to the fullest.

I make myself feel bad for not wanting to be there.

Because… I should, shouldn’t I?

I have no idea if any of you people can relate.

That’s the horrible thing about writing. Until you respond, it’s like I’m talking to a blank wall. For all I know—you could all be like “what the hell is this girl talking about?”

But tonight, I guess I just don’t give a damn.

I don’t want to go out. I want to sit in my bed and eat chocolate bars and Subway cookies and watch The Walking Dead. And I don’t want to feel guilty or saddened about it.

Because it’s what I want to do.

My nana is a pretty cool woman. I asked her if I was a “grandma” for not wanting to go out with my girlfriends. Or to my friend’s house. Or to see anyone for that matter. I didn’t have a reason not to. I just… didn’t.

She told me this.

“The world is going to keep spinning with or without you there. So you make your decision, and you be happy where you are.”

Pretty amazing.

So maybe the lesson is that. Or maybe the lesson is to forget the fear of missing out. Maybe it’s to not feel bad about doing you. Or maybe it’s all of these things wrapped up into one.

You will miss out. You can’t always be everywhere, and you won’t always want to do everything. The good news is that the world, fortunately or unfortunately, will keep spinning with or without you. So make your decision, and be happy where you are. Do you. And don’t feel sad or sorry about it.

Day 152.

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